I am one of those people that like putting things in boxes, labelling things, giving things a name and a definition. With the sexual relationships I have outside of my marriage I like to do the same and I have been pondering if others do this and if they come up with the same labels as me. For me the men in my life fall into three different categories: Fuck buddies, friends with benefits and lovers.
Fuck Buddies: I think this one is pretty self explanatory. You turn up, you fuck, you fuck off. There is no relationship. Just a spark and a desire to get naked together. Nothing more, nothing less. The most simplest and stress free of any type of relationship. For me this was Helicopter guy, a fab fuck buddy to be sure!
Friends with benefits: I always think of this one where you are friends first and foremost and the sex is just a bonus. The original bit on the side is my best example of this. Beyond anything else, we are mates. We enjoying hanging out together, we talk about more than just sex, we share what's going on in our lives. We occasionally get semi-naked and naughty together but its not the be all and end all of our friendship, although it certainly is fun and a huge part of why we are friends!
Lovers: When I think of the word 'Lovers' it conjurers up an idea of intimacy and closeness within the relationship. Where you are more than just friends. There is a spark of attraction for not only the body but the mind. Sex is not just about fucking and getting your needs met but beyond that into a intimate sharing of everything tied together with a bond of something indescribable.
Its almost like graduated levels. You can start as a fuck buddy, become a friend with benefits and evolve to a lover......but its a one way thing, forwards not backwards. You cannot descend from being a lover to a fuck buddy, or can you?
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